..Bi possible?

[Curious Strange]

So, lately I've been juggling with my emotions, since I might be gay...or bi. I'll try to explain

With girls, it seems like it would be more exciting to be in a relationship with a girl. I love talking to them, listening to them, messing with them, holding them, etc. But the problem is, not very attracted to them. Of course I could have sex with a girl, some gays I talk to seem repulsed by the idea but I could see myself having sex with either really, it's just the physical attraction is more there with guys. As in, I'm not necessarily attracted to a girl's boobs/ass etc. but more in the sense of "wow, she's gorgeous" rather than "holy shit she's hot"

With guys, the physical attraction is more there. As in, I would think "he's hot" instead of "he's gorgeous". But being in a relationship with a guy is not appealing to me at all. No, not because it would seem awkward to be in a guy+guy relationship, but because I feel like it just couldn't work out. I could just never treat a guy like I want to a girl in a relationship. It's very hard for me to explain this to try and get the message through, so that you don't assume things..

Does this...make any sense? o.o

[hillenbrand02]

I think your question is similar to this thread, so check it out

http://forums.govteen.com/showthread.php?t=300001

[Zomm]

Originally Posted by Curious Strange

So, lately I've been juggling with my emotions, since I might be gay...or bi. I'll try to explain

With girls, it seems like it would be more exciting to be in a relationship with a girl. I love talking to them, listening to them, messing with them, holding them, etc. But the problem is, not very attracted to them. Of course I could have sex with a girl, some gays I talk to seem repulsed by the idea but I could see myself having sex with either really, it's just the physical attraction is more there with guys. As in, I'm not necessarily attracted to a girl's boobs/ass etc. but more in the sense of "wow, she's gorgeous" rather than "holy shit she's hot"

With guys, the physical attraction is more there. As in, I would think "he's hot" instead of "he's gorgeous". But being in a relationship with a guy is not appealing to me at all. No, not because it would seem awkward to be in a guy+guy relationship, but because I feel like it just couldn't work out. I could just never treat a guy like I want to a girl in a relationship. It's very hard for me to explain this to try and get the message through, so that you don't assume things..

Does this...make any sense? o.o

Sure it does. That's what being gay and trying to come to terms with it sounds like to me.

[Numbers]

How old are you?

Girls mature a lot faster than guys. If you're looking for a caring, sensitive guy in high school--well they're there, but aren't exactly the majority. Keep in mind that you appear to be automatically saying no to a relationship that, all other things considered, should work out fine. At the moment you're going with societal programming--it's not even a specific girl or guy you're referring to, just girls=yay and guys=not. If I'm interpreting this correctly, it's not that you feel it wouldn't work out, but almost like a shouldn't--like you just wouldn't fit in when it comes to that relationship. It'll work itself out over time.

[And?]

Originally Posted by Zomm

That's what being gay and trying to come to terms with it sounds like to me.

Possibly.

Alternatively: You're young enough to be 'sexually immature'. I mean that because you're exploring your sexuality, it will take time for you to find a sort of happy-medium, and it will take time to solidify where your true emotions lie. Most bisexuals tend to have a preference - which is why the sexuality is looked upon with so much scorn - but not all do. It's perfectly fine. You might want to look up pansexuality; you do seem to have a sort of ignorance of gender, and more concentrate on aesthetics, etc..

There's this whole thing about "I must figure out what I am right now or I might esplode", but you really don't. A true, solid, sexuality takes time to formalise and decide upon. Relax, and in time you will realise whether you are gay, bisexual, confused, on fire, etc..

[Curious Strange]

Okay..you guys have helped me a lot, but I have another question:

Would dating be required to find this stuff out? Or will I just "omg realize it" eventually? Because I don't want to start dating guys and people think I'm gay, and have to tell people "I don't know yet whether I'm gay or not" which I think sounds kinda dumb..or even worse SECRETLY date a guy and have people find out by me not telling them, that would be even worse..

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by Curious Strange

Okay..you guys have helped me a lot, but I have another question:

Would dating be required to find this stuff out? Or will I just "omg realize it" eventually? Because I don't want to start dating guys and people think I'm gay, and have to tell people "I don't know yet whether I'm gay or not" which I think sounds kinda dumb..or even worse SECRETLY date a guy and have people find out by me not telling them, that would be even worse..

You'll find out what you like as you experience both sides of the spectrum. It'll make itself clearer as you age, mature, and get more comfortable with both sexes and what goes with each kind of relationship. I wouldn't worry about it too terribly much, just go with it and you'll know when you know.

[CaptainObvious]

Originally Posted by Curious Strange

So, lately I've been juggling with my emotions, since I might be gay...or bi. I'll try to explain

With girls, it seems like it would be more exciting to be in a relationship with a girl. I love talking to them, listening to them, messing with them, holding them, etc. But the problem is, not very attracted to them. Of course I could have sex with a girl, some gays I talk to seem repulsed by the idea but I could see myself having sex with either really, it's just the physical attraction is more there with guys. As in, I'm not necessarily attracted to a girl's boobs/ass etc. but more in the sense of "wow, she's gorgeous" rather than "holy shit she's hot"

With guys, the physical attraction is more there. As in, I would think "he's hot" instead of "he's gorgeous". But being in a relationship with a guy is not appealing to me at all. No, not because it would seem awkward to be in a guy+guy relationship, but because I feel like it just couldn't work out. I could just never treat a guy like I want to a girl in a relationship. It's very hard for me to explain this to try and get the message through, so that you don't assume things..

Does this...make any sense? o.o

Sounds like you're just in that stage of unwrapping all the societal assumptions regarding dating from your own mind. If the physical attraction is there you could be bisexual, but it sounds a lot more like you're on your way to accepting being gay.

[Zomm]

Originally Posted by Curious Strange

Okay..you guys have helped me a lot, but I have another question:

Would dating be required to find this stuff out? Or will I just "omg realize it" eventually? Because I don't want to start dating guys and people think I'm gay, and have to tell people "I don't know yet whether I'm gay or not" which I think sounds kinda dumb..or even worse SECRETLY date a guy and have people find out by me not telling them, that would be even worse..

It will all work itself out. As stated before, trying to hyper-analyze the situation is unnecessary and will only cause needless stress.

As far as dating goes, go with what you want most. Stick with what's works. You dont need to declare your sexuality prior to dating anyone - just do what you want. In time, it will be obvious what your sexuality is as your dating patterns will reflect that.

Sit back, relax, let your body do the talking/acting and eventually you'll understand what it's been telling you.

[LoadedDice]

You don't have any obligation to tell people about you're sexuality so the who think you're gay can fuck off, don't worry about it sounding dumb to say you're just figuring it out, you don't have to say anything at all. And also, at first I felt like I'd be uncomfortable in a relationship with someone of the same gender but later I craved it. But figuring this stuff out comes with time, don't rush, don't worry.

[AAASAS]

It's just youself not allowing youself to be like that. You need to come more to terms with your sexuality, and that just takes time, and a lot of pondering to yourself.

There was a point where I didn't let myself check out guys, now I can't fucking take my eyes off them... and I find myself acting exactly like a straight guys does towards females, I get horned up, and feel like telling the guys how gorgeous he is.

[LifeOnMars]

If you meet a guy you want to date, date him. Vice versa with girls. Dont worry about it so much.

[Curious Strange]

Another thing I've seen posted around here quite often is that you shouldn't date someone unless you know it'll all work out in the end..because it's "not fair to them". But I don't really understand, how do you know if you haven't tried?

(I'm not ignoring your posts, I am reading them, I'm just not replying to all of them)