Post Rescue Stress WARNING has some disturbing content

[Cory64]

I am a lifeguard at a pool. I am a new lifeguard, hardly been in the chair for a month. I am 15. It is a rather small pool, but we still have around ten day camps that alternate dazys. All ten were at the pool today. Buisiest day all year. My manager even told me to stay on my toes. This pool has never seen a drowning incident, and never even transported a patron out with EMS before.

Here is how the last 45 minutes of my shift went.

There are five chairs. I am on the auxillary backup chair. Most of the kids move out of my zone for a minute. I hear a lot of commotion. I look up. I see about 50 patrons gathered aorund the stairs at the 3ft entrance. I notice the lifeguard in that location take off running towards the phone. I look over at my closest guard, and we blow the whistle, and he stays to clear the pool. I look back one more time at the crowd. I see another lifeguard who was at the deep end is now stading over something crying uncontrolably.

I take off running to that area. When I arrive, I see a three year old boy just outside the wter. One of the day camp supervisors is beginning chest compressions. The boy's eyes are rolled back totaly. He is not breathing. There is vomit spewing from his mouth like a rabid dog. I immediately grab the rescue CPR mask so she won';t have to be contaminated by his vomit. But as soon as I bend down, I just instinctually say, "Ma'am, I'm going to give rescue breaths. We are going to do 2 person CPR. She is very emotional, but she says okay and starts counting outloud. I give him two rescue breaths. No reaction. She goes again. I give two rescue breaths. I remove the mask incase of vomiting. The boy's teeth clench and he makes this little faint struggling sound. She continues chest compressions as we are shouting, "Keep with us!" "keep struggling" I look p at the head guard and ask if the EMS is on its way (the fire station is next door, but I hadn't heard any sirens) He says yes, I hear "30" I give two breaths. Again the faint grunt. After the fifth set I give two breaths. Suddenly he starts to make a new noise. Then he breaks out crying. We encourage hgim to cry. MY CPR partner is crying nw two. She grabs me on the head and kisses me. We roll him into a recovery position. I rub his hair and tell him he will be okay. His eyes are still rolled back. By then when I look up the paramedics are staring at me. We continue to comfort him. By now I begin to hear sounds again, and I gain my senses back. The boys gradmother has her hand on my shoulder. Other people, includng my mom, are thanking Jesus.

The EMS wiped off the boys face and put him in a warm towel, and laid him on the stretcher, IO never even saw them leave. I stood up and immediatly buckled to my knees in exhaustion. My co-workers are all giving me a horrified look. I turn around and hug the other woman for several minutes while she cries in my arm. MY manager comes out and asks us to file reports.

Now it is about 10 hours later. I just got off the phone with my boss, who told me that she has a message from the mayor and the Fire Department, and she told me the boy was released from the hospital. I am being called a hero. She wants me to meet with the staff for a little therapy kind of thing. Apparently I was pale as newspaper and walked like a ghost when I was there, but I left quickly.

She told me that she had just gotten off the phone with the woman who helped me, and he had fainted when she got back to work, and is mortified basically.

I have always been a strng person. I don't cry, but I have a lot of feelings, I'm very deep. I have aspired to ba a paramedic for years. I watch a lot of documentaries on CPR and those things, but seeing it has left me totaly indifferent. I don't know how to explain my feelings. Every time I think I'm gonna cry, I end up shaking my head and just giving a small laugh. I really am still in shock I think. I am constantl lost in thought, but now more than ever.

I haven't eaten in hours. I keep seeing that boy with his eyes rolling freely with the ways I move his head. I see that boy with puke dripping out f him ears and eyes. I think of the boy, when he gave a struggle, but couldn't do it.

I am completely indifferent right now. I don't know if I am fine or if I am on the verge of seriously loosing it. I need advice, please. I do feel proud that I kep getting showered with complements, but I always just give a half hearted smile and a blank stare. I want to go itno EMS, but I am really having a hard time getting past this.

I should be happy, the boy lived, I felt the life return to him. But I'm not, I'm happy for him though.

Sorry the spelling is absolutely horrible. But I can't go back through this message now. Any advice would be appreciated.


-Cory-

[Cory64]

Anyone who happens to read this whole thing really is a saint, sorry it is so long.

[Zelda]

Please see a therapist. Give yourself some time to get over the shock, and seek some professional counseling.

[kdee]

I notice the lifeguard in that location take off running towards the phone. I look over at my closest guard, and we blow the whistle, and he stays to clear the pool. I look back one more time at the crowd. I see another lifeguard who was at the deep end is now stading over something crying uncontrolably.

To start with, some clarification for my benefit would be nice (please ). I understand the actions of the lifeguards such as calling the EMS, clearing the pool. That all makes good sense.

But, what's up with the random lifeguard who was "the deep end is now standing over something crying uncontrollably." Was he standing over the boy? You mention only yourself and the day counselor as having any involvement in helping the boy. Did none of the other lifeguards at least make an attempt to help out with the resuscitation processes? The only reason I ask is because it seems to me that it would be the lifeguards of any of the people present who would immediately be doing all of the CPR stuff (I mean, were not they more trained in CPR than anyone else there?). I can understand the one guy clearing the pool and calling the EMS. But did the other guy just do nothing?

I haven't eaten in hours. I keep seeing that boy with his eyes rolling freely with the ways I move his head. I see that boy with puke dripping out f him ears and eyes. I think of the boy, when he gave a struggle, but couldn't do it.

I am completely indifferent right now. I don't know if I am fine or if I am on the verge of seriously loosing it. I need advice, please. I do feel proud that I kep getting showered with complements, but I always just give a half hearted smile and a blank stare.

Somehow, I don't see any of this as anything but normal excitment over suddenly having accomplished a great thing. You probably would have felt something very similar had you ended a life instead of having saved one...

It's all very good. Do your best not to let it get in the way of accomplishing your day-to-day tasks, though (schoolwork, etc...)..

Please see a therapist. Give yourself some time to get over the shock, and seek some professional counseling.

I hate to be contrary, but I genuinely don't think that would be necessary..

[Shreyas]

Gradually you will forget that incident about that boy, you can always see a good therapist for it as said by Zelda. I think that incident has caused a largee impact on you. you can also try some mind clearing exercises if that thing comes in your mind again.

[UrIn4It]

standard disclaimer: im not a psychologist or psychiatrist, my experience with any of this is limited to 2 semesters college psychology classes.

great story, and congratulations on saving a life. it sounds like ur nerves are more or less just shot from the sensory overload of the experience coupled with your own feelings about it. i wouldnt say its like post traumatic stress, but its similar, just in a positive way instead of a bad way

if you still feel this way after a good nights sleep, see if you can find someone to just sit and talk to you about it. it doesnt even have to be some shrink. you might just need a good ol' fashioned 'let it all out'. try to eat and drink in the morning too. i would say if you still feel this way in 2-3 days, you definitely need to seek professional help. the stress of the situation and your emotional responses together seem to have completely overwhelmed you

[U.S.-NAVY]

Situations of high stress can cause one to come down with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. As of yet it's too early to diagnose that, but seeing a therapist as a preventative measure is likely a good idea.

I usually don't advocate self-diagnosis, but I will give you some information so that you can recognize some symptoms of PTSD if you start seeing them. If you do see any of these in yourself, strongly consider seeing a professional, since PTSD is a very serious condition associated with much domestic violence and suicides.

The standard clinical diagnosis of PTSD, according to the APA's DSM-IV-TR (the reference manual for all mental health professionals within the U.S.) is:

A. The person has been exposed to a traumatic event in which both of the following have been present:

(1) the person experienced, witnessed, or was confronted with an event or events that involved actual or threatened death or serious injury, or a threat to the physical integrity of self or others (2) the person's response involved intense fear, helplessness, or horror. Note: In children, this may be expressed instead by disorganized or agitated behavior.

B. The traumatic event is persistently reexperienced in one (or more) of the following ways:

(1) recurrent and intrusive distressing recollections of the event, including images, thoughts, or perceptions. Note: In young children, repetitive play may occur in which themes or aspects of the trauma are expressed.

(2) recurrent distressing dreams of the event. Note: In children, there may be frightening dreams without recognizable content.

(3) acting or feeling as if the traumatic event were recurring (includes a sense of reliving the experience, illusions, hallucinations, and dissociative flashback episodes, including those that occur upon awakening or when intoxicated). Note: In young children, trauma-specific reenactment may occur.

(4) intense psychological distress at exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event.

(5) physiological reactivity on exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event.

C. Persistent avoidance of stimuli associated with the trauma and numbing of general responsiveness (not present before the trauma), as indicated by three (or more) of the following:

(1) efforts to avoid thoughts, feelings, or conversations associated with the trauma

(2) efforts to avoid activities, places, or people that arouse recollections of the trauma

(3) inability to recall an important aspect of the trauma

(4) markedly diminished interest or participation in significant activities

(5) feeling of detachment or estrangement from others

(6) restricted range of affect (e.g., unable to have loving feelings)

(7) sense of a foreshortened future (e.g., does not expect to have a career, marriage, children, or a normal life span)

D. Persistent symptoms of increased arousal (not present before the trauma), as indicated by two (or more) of the following:

(1) difficulty falling or staying asleep
(2) irritability or outbursts of anger
(3) difficulty concentrating
(4) hypervigilance
(5) exaggerated startle response

E. Duration of the disturbance (symptoms in Criteria B, C, and D) is more than one month.

F. The disturbance causes clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning.

Specify if:
Acute: if duration of symptoms is less than 3 months
Chronic: if duration of symptoms is 3 months or more

Specify if:
With Delayed Onset: if onset of symptoms is at least 6 months after the stressor

As of yet, you don't explicitly show any signs of PTSD (though I guarantee this is the most pressing concern in this situation). However, keep aware of them and let people you know look out for them in you (self-diagnosis is often tenuous) because you were clearly exposed to "extreme traumatic stressor involving direct personal experience of an event that involves . . . a threat to the physical integrity of another person."

[Cory64]

kdee. I will try to give some clarification. There are 5 guards present. I will use their names. Jay is sitting at Zero-Depth, he had no involvement but crowd control. Danny is only about 10 ft. from my chair, on the other side of a 10ft. wide slide well. Jamie is sitting at the 6ft, pretty much farthest away from everyone. Carrie is sitting at the 3 ft. entrance at the stairs.

Carrie initally sees the boy laying motionless at the surface, a very good feat seeing as the stairs was crowded with so many people all day anyway. She blows the whistle. Terry, from the dat camp begins CPR, and tells Carrie to call 911. She rushes inside. Now I see Carrie rushing away, which draws my attention to the crowd. I look over at Danny, the headguard on duty. We blow our whistles. Danny stays behind to clear the pool safely. I rush over to the scene. Jay is still in his chair not paying attention. Jamie is now at the scene. But she is just as new as me, a 15 year old girl with a very soft heart. She is in a state of complete shock. Everyone is screaming at her, and she is paralyzed with fear.

From there is run up to the scene, notice the vomit in the facial area. I grab the pocket mask. We begin 2 person CPR. After about 5 cycles the boy begins to cry. We roll him into a recovery position. We stay to comfort him. The EMS eventually clean him up, and carry him off.


That is from the incident report.


I am feeling a lot better today. I was very happy the boy is okay, and is now out of the hospital. I get to meet with my boss, the other on duty lifeguards, and the fire chief (my uncle) today. Plus I am going to be able to visit the family today. I wish I could see Terry, because she is still realy shaken up. I talked to Jamie today, she saw the boy when he was first vomitting (something I didn't even remember until long afte, because I pushed it out of my mind in order to actually give CPR) and she is still really shaken up. She was crying all day yesterday, bless her heart she is the sweetest person I ever met, and she was the star of the lifeguard class when I took it with her (I was the screw up who non one thought would pass) but as my manager put it, people react in different ways. All of the day camp leaders standing there knew CPR, but instead of helping all any of them did was scream at me and JAmie. I think everyone just expected Terry to do 1 person CPR, and I was barely even taught 2 person, I just grabbed the mask because I saw vomit.

As some of my other threads have stated, I am trying to currently be active in EMS, and I am hoping to start an ET-B course the day I turn 18. I can't see myself doing anything but EMS. Yesterday both confirmed and dissporoved that feeling. It felt great to have that boy come back too life in my arms. ll of the research I did payed off in helping me to get into that patient first mind set that is used in all forms of medicine. But it really tore me up afterwards to see such a young boy drown and almost die. I was told afterwards that we had started CPR just in time, because he was only seconds away from total asytole (he was apparently drowning for longer than anyone thought)

I think after everything I go through today I will feel a lot better. I taled to my boss on the phone last night for a real long time, she has been through this a handfull of times, she really offered som great advice. Also I talked to my cousin for a long time who was one of the responding EMT's to the scene.

I don't think therapy will be necesarry. I just want to see the boy (probably not going to happen) or at least talk to his family. I also want to see Terry from the day camp, but I only have one more day in the chair this year

[Blaster13]

Hey, hang in there. I just want you to know that to be a rescue worker, you have to be able to deal with this stuff. I know its hard. Im a fire fighter, and remember working my first MVA. It was a head on, and one of the passengers was DOS. I did my job, but I bet I threw up for 5 minutes after I got home.

Good luck with becoming a Paramedic. If you have a volunteer fire department in your town, check with them about joining once you graduate. A lot of departments will help, or completely pay for your training. Even some paid departments are so desperate for full trained paramedics, they will send you through the academy and get your medical training.

[Rombishead]

WOw dude, this is amazing. Lol u got me in a tear lol. Nice job, im the same age as you and well if that happend id have absolutly no idea what to do.I just cant put into words how much of a hero you are lol saving a 3 year olds life is the work of a saint. Im not much on therapy but I would say just see that boy and talk to him for a while and that might help? You know for like clarifitcation.

[Hustle]

I don't really have much else to add, apart from well done.

[Hellbreaker]

as my trainer would say : go hard, go pro. nice job kid. you were given this job and you did it well, and that proves that you deserve it. you should be happy, not scared or stressed. I'll give an idea that might be an advice : go visit that kid or meet with him or his parents if that might confort you.

[Hordes_of_Chaos]

Originally Posted by Cory64

I am a lifeguard at a pool. I am a new lifeguard, hardly been in the chair for a month. I am 15. It is a rather small pool, but we still have around ten day camps that alternate dazys. All ten were at the pool today. Buisiest day all year. My manager even told me to stay on my toes. This pool has never seen a drowning incident, and never even transported a patron out with EMS before.

Here is how the last 45 minutes of my shift went.

There are five chairs. I am on the auxillary backup chair. Most of the kids move out of my zone for a minute. I hear a lot of commotion. I look up. I see about 50 patrons gathered aorund the stairs at the 3ft entrance. I notice the lifeguard in that location take off running towards the phone. I look over at my closest guard, and we blow the whistle, and he stays to clear the pool. I look back one more time at the crowd. I see another lifeguard who was at the deep end is now stading over something crying uncontrolably.

I take off running to that area. When I arrive, I see a three year old boy just outside the wter. One of the day camp supervisors is beginning chest compressions. The boy's eyes are rolled back totaly. He is not breathing. There is vomit spewing from his mouth like a rabid dog. I immediately grab the rescue CPR mask so she won';t have to be contaminated by his vomit. But as soon as I bend down, I just instinctually say, "Ma'am, I'm going to give rescue breaths. We are going to do 2 person CPR. She is very emotional, but she says okay and starts counting outloud. I give him two rescue breaths. No reaction. She goes again. I give two rescue breaths. I remove the mask incase of vomiting. The boy's teeth clench and he makes this little faint struggling sound. She continues chest compressions as we are shouting, "Keep with us!" "keep struggling" I look p at the head guard and ask if the EMS is on its way (the fire station is next door, but I hadn't heard any sirens) He says yes, I hear "30" I give two breaths. Again the faint grunt. After the fifth set I give two breaths. Suddenly he starts to make a new noise. Then he breaks out crying. We encourage hgim to cry. MY CPR partner is crying nw two. She grabs me on the head and kisses me. We roll him into a recovery position. I rub his hair and tell him he will be okay. His eyes are still rolled back. By then when I look up the paramedics are staring at me. We continue to comfort him. By now I begin to hear sounds again, and I gain my senses back. The boys gradmother has her hand on my shoulder. Other people, includng my mom, are thanking Jesus.

The EMS wiped off the boys face and put him in a warm towel, and laid him on the stretcher, IO never even saw them leave. I stood up and immediatly buckled to my knees in exhaustion. My co-workers are all giving me a horrified look. I turn around and hug the other woman for several minutes while she cries in my arm. MY manager comes out and asks us to file reports.

Now it is about 10 hours later. I just got off the phone with my boss, who told me that she has a message from the mayor and the Fire Department, and she told me the boy was released from the hospital. I am being called a hero. She wants me to meet with the staff for a little therapy kind of thing. Apparently I was pale as newspaper and walked like a ghost when I was there, but I left quickly.

She told me that she had just gotten off the phone with the woman who helped me, and he had fainted when she got back to work, and is mortified basically.

I have always been a strng person. I don't cry, but I have a lot of feelings, I'm very deep. I have aspired to ba a paramedic for years. I watch a lot of documentaries on CPR and those things, but seeing it has left me totaly indifferent. I don't know how to explain my feelings. Every time I think I'm gonna cry, I end up shaking my head and just giving a small laugh. I really am still in shock I think. I am constantl lost in thought, but now more than ever.

I haven't eaten in hours. I keep seeing that boy with his eyes rolling freely with the ways I move his head. I see that boy with puke dripping out f him ears and eyes. I think of the boy, when he gave a struggle, but couldn't do it.

I am completely indifferent right now. I don't know if I am fine or if I am on the verge of seriously loosing it. I need advice, please. I do feel proud that I kep getting showered with complements, but I always just give a half hearted smile and a blank stare. I want to go itno EMS, but I am really having a hard time getting past this.

I should be happy, the boy lived, I felt the life return to him. But I'm not, I'm happy for him though.

Sorry the spelling is absolutely horrible. But I can't go back through this message now. Any advice would be appreciated.


-Cory-

First off, you are the fucking man and a true hero. I really really admire what you did. Now, it seems like you are suffering from PTSD or some similar condition. You should talk to a psychologist who could help you deal with the problems. They might refer you to another person, depending on what the situation is.

[Sole]

Cory, what I think is truly amazing about you is how you took ACTION straight away during the incident.

Some scary, crazy shit happened and your head went "BOOM, DO THIS, DO THIS".

You cut through the difficult shit that stops most people from stepping up. That is some special thinking you've got.

Kudos buddy!

[El Badass]

You are truely amazing!
You were just in shock the first day and you were having a hard time realizing what had just happened.
I'm glad you are feeling better after and as time goes on you will feel better and better as the shock wears off