What to be prepared for.

[AAASAS]

So after a couple of visits to the doctor, and some tests, I've been diagnosed with clinical depression, though my doctor thinks its bipolar disorder.

However I think its just called being in the closet, so I think I need to just get it over with and tell others, cause I'm sick of not giving a shit about anything, but still somehow being able to care if people know I'm gay.

I supposedly had a major depressive episode for nearly half a year last year(my graduating year), based on what I told my doctor.... I had lost a lot of weight, was unusually tired, had trouble doing basic stuff; like getting ready in the morning(it physically was hard to get changed, I had NO energy), as well I had phantom pains all over my body, that my doctor remembers me visiting for, only to get diagnosed with being healthy.

Anyways, before I'm sent to some therapist, or put on some pills(which I'd personally never take, I don't even like taking tylenol), I think I need to try and come out and see if that solves anything, because at this point, it almost seems impossible to continue living my life the way I am, I literally do not want to do it, and have trouble getting out of bed EVERY morning, it's been like this for the past 4 years.

Soo my question is, what should I be prepared for when I tell them, I really know how to tell them, but I kind of dont wan't to be floored by any of their responses. It's not really them accepting or not accepting I'm looking for, its how to react, and play it cool to their responses, I mean it's a big deal, and there are tons of responses I can get.
My main worry is someone saying its cool, and then dropping the subject, because that really doesn't seem like enough clearance for me, and I have a feeling my friends are going to stray away from the subject if they do accept me.

Luke Edit: Formatted this so it was easier to read, hope you don't mind.

[Ewan]

I really think you are depressed. Some of that might be due to being closeted, but I think there are deeper problems there that need to be sorted out. I doubt coming out will solve it.

I think talking with a therapist and coming out would do you a world of good. You can't force people to talk with at length about your sexuality - if they say "Cool" and drop the subject you can't do much about it.

[Luke]

Take a look at this thread. See how others have done it, and see if you can use any of that.

Be prepared for the worst, but at the same time, don't stress yourself out further about it. Your friends may well surprise you by how supportive they can be.

Best of luck with this.

[DoBesh]

Well, it is possible you are depressed because you are in the closet. It might also be something else, but being in the closet doesn't help a lot for sure. I think it's a good idea to come out, because it will probably be a big relief.

What I've learned so far is that the best way to come out is by not making a big deal of it. Just tell your friends you're gay but don't try to tell people that actually don't care. Just try to be open about it, when someone asks you, admit it. The only ones you have to tell are your friends and your parents if you want that, all the others are not really neccesary I think, and might only make it worse.

[failed_attempt]

Honesly, if you are depressed I would recommend getting out of that depression before you came out. When I was extremely depressed I think I would I have ended my life if I were to have come out then (not exaggerating). Coming out can be extremely stressful expecially if you live in hicktown USA like I do and everyone is super closed-mined. I began coming out in school about a week ago. It's not a "boom" you're out kind of thing, you are always coming out to people just about everyday. So far I've had two friends totally treat me like shit and it really hurts/sucks.

The way I came out was by answering "yes" when someone asked if I was gay. Then rumors spread and everyone asks if you are gay and you have to say it over and over and over and over again... It gets easier...

[Neverender]

You do strike me as depressed.

One of the main sources of my depression, since I was very young in fact, has been my sexuality. Having recently come out to my sister, I can say that the risk was worth the reward. We have a better relationship for it. But you know, that's my situation so far. It could be either a positive or negative experience, or more likely a mix of both.

In the case of major depression or bipolar disorder, it seems to me that getting you stabilized with medication and counseling will put you in a better position to come out later on down the line. But if you've decided that you don't want to medicate, and you know that the source of your depression seems to be the weight of being a closet gay, then perhaps it follows that lifting that weight off of your shoulders will help. I just question if that will solve it. In fact, based off of what your doctor has said, I doubt it.

I know you don't want to hear this, but I caution you to really think about medical treatment if that's what your doctor says, because there is nothing worse than mood instability. If I didn't have my psychiatric medication, I would be either dead or way off the wall right now.

Best wishes to you in whatever you decide. And remember that coming out is just not something that we have any control over. As you've said, you're aware that they will either accept or not accept, but the content of their response may be such that you won't get the type of closure that is ideal to you. I guess it's something you have to be okay with going in. So if you perceive some mystery as to what an individual thinks, don't think too hard about it. If they have a problem with it, you'll know.

[damle]

So after a couple of visits to the doctor, and some tests, I've been diagnosed with clinical depression, though my doctor thinks its bipolar disorder.

However I think its just called being in the closet, so I think I need to just get it over with and tell others, cause I'm sick of not giving a shit about anything, but still somehow being able to care if people know I'm gay.

I supposedly had a major depressive episode for nearly half a year last year(my graduating year), based on what I told my doctor.... I had lost a lot of weight, was unusually tired, had trouble doing basic stuff; like getting ready in the morning(it physically was hard to get changed, I had NO energy), as well I had phantom pains all over my body, that my doctor remembers me visiting for, only to get diagnosed with being healthy.

Anyways, before I'm sent to some therapist, or put on some pills(which I'd personally never take, I don't even like taking tylenol), I think I need to try and come out and see if that solves anything, because at this point, it almost seems impossible to continue living my life the way I am, I literally do not want to do it, and have trouble getting out of bed EVERY morning, it's been like this for the past 4 years.

Soo my question is, what should I be prepared for when I tell them, I really know how to tell them, but I kind of dont wan't to be floored by any of their responses. It's not really them accepting or not accepting I'm looking for, its how to react, and play it cool to their responses, I mean it's a big deal, and there are tons of responses I can get.
My main worry is someone saying its cool, and then dropping the subject, because that really doesn't seem like enough clearance for me, and I have a feeling my friends are going to stray away from the subject if they do accept me.

Luke Edit: Formatted this so it was easier to read, hope you don't mind.

I definitely think you're suffering from depression, and I'm sure I've said that. But once you're in it, it's not that easy to come out, and I do think that if your doctor prescribes medication, you should take it. (Please don't put yourself over the medication what you put yourself over coming out.) But you will, absolutely, positively, definitely find that if you take the medicine, when it kicks in, you will have NO PROBLEM whatsoever telling people you're gay.

And then you can tell your therapist that the ordeal that's been weighing you down for so many years is gone (tell him or her the whole being gay story), and that you want to be weaned off the medicine.

If your friends say it's okay that you're gay and don't make a big deal conversation wise, you can assume that they too may be taken by surprise or shocked, so don't put them on the spot any more that day. Wait a week and bring it up again. Depending on who it is and what they said, you can start a conversation with "I'm glad you took my gay news so well - I was really sweating it", or - well, I'm sure you can find something to say that brings it up again. Maybe ask them "did you already know or suspect I was gay when I told you?" Give it a week or two for them to experience the reality that you're the same you now that they know you're gay, and then bring it up and ask how they're doing with it, for example - you'll figure something out to ask.

As far as guessing what they're gonna say so that you can act cool when you hear their responses, that's not always possible in life. Sometimes the way you learn to think on your feet, or think quick, is by trial under fire.