Safe Zone

[Josh]

So because I have come to the conclusion that there are more gay, lesbian, and bisexual students on my campus of 1,000 than just myself, my co-founder for QFLAG, my exboyfriend, the two creepy guys that hit on me when they get drunk at parties, and the one guy that everyone and their mother knew was gay before he did, I decided to establish the safe zone program at my university. Admitadly it was extremely difficult to come out on a campus where no one was out.. I thought after I came out that because I was so well known and so invloved in so many things that would be enough to make people feel more comfortable but since it has so far only worked for 3 people who came out after me and only to a select group of people and kinda halfassadly clearly that wasn't enough.

I surprisingly managed to get the support from everyone in the administration from the dean of students to directors of res life to a number of general faculty and health and wellness directors. But now what? who should I be meeting with, what kinda budget propsal do I need, how can I establish a training program?
is anyone familiar with this program or had any expereince with it?

[sean]

I admire your outgoing personality, but I would recommend finding a few other charismatic people to help you try to expand the Safe Zone. It doesn't even matter much if they're straight or not. If they're straight, they can show that there is no problem to being open and that you will be accepted. If they're gay, same thing. Either way, it also takes time for people to recognize the change. If you can find another person who started it on another campus, ask them for advice too. They might have a few ideas on what you can do to get people more comfortable.

[Josh]

I admire your outgoing personality, but I would recommend finding a few other charismatic people to help you try to expand the Safe Zone. It doesn't even matter much if they're straight or not. If they're straight, they can show that there is no problem to being open and that you will be accepted. If they're gay, same thing. Either way, it also takes time for people to recognize the change. If you can find another person who started it on another campus, ask them for advice too. They might have a few ideas on what you can do to get people more comfortable.

There are actually around 50 members in the club QFLAG which I started earlier this year and about 46 of them are straight and I know a bunch of them are for it as are all the RAs I've talked to as far as participating in the training. We have made our presence fairly known, we had a group go to DC for the march in October and we were on the universities front page.. before the end of the semester we are doing an awarness week. It's just a matter of having this resource available to the people that need it.. It's great to see all these people joining my club who aren't necessarily members of the GLBT community but I really want to be able to get help to the people who really need it. our support group disscussions are kinda empty most times.. this would offer people a confidential means of reaching people, espcially through the hotline which I really don't mind being on call for every night. It's just that some students need someone to talk to but are not ready to come out yet and are afraid to come to our meetings and they don't get counseling because they don't want parents asking questions.

[sean]

Maybe if you create an anonymous message board for people? Sort of like the Facebook or MySpace honesty boxes. It gives people not quite ready to come out a chance to get advice from people on the campus.

[Josh]

Maybe if you create an anonymous message board for people? Sort of like the Facebook or MySpace honesty boxes. It gives people not quite ready to come out a chance to get advice from people on the campus.

That would definitely be a great idea. It would have to be heavily monitored obviously as we do have some immature people around campus even though I know they would never dare cross me because my fraternity brothers would eat them alive for it

In fact, this weekend, on halloween, I was at a party and I was sitting in one room with two other guys that i didn't know one was dressed like a zombie and had been sitting there in the corner all night and hadn't moved nor talked to anyone. He looked at me and called me a faggot under his breath when I sat down across from him.. I asked what he said to make sure since it was loud and I had been drinking.. he just stared at me and because he was dressed like a zombie and had a blank stare on his face it was really kinda scary and he said eventually "you heard what I said" people in the room had started to look at us and when I said more loudly "cause it sounds like you just called me a faggot" everyone in the room stopped and the music got turned off and in seconds a few of my brothers had him out of the house and thrown out on the street. hahah, yeah homophobia hasn't been tolerated much around campus since I came out to my fraternity and started the club.
It was scary though because I know that if I had chosen to walk back to campus around 2 or 3 as I normally would after a party I could have easily been jumped or worse had that guy kept his mouth shut just a bit longer.. and I know it could still happen, but I try not to give in to fear or intimidation. I've had one or two cowardly threats either slid under my door or written on my car but I walk out of the dorm every morning with a smile on my face cause I'm not going to let them get me down. It doesn't change the fact that I still live in a world where walking home by myself at night leaves me checking behind me every so often wondering if I'll be the next Matthew Shepard and have legislation passed in my name (and my campus is in the nicest area in Charlotte so hate violence is about all I have to worry about as opposed to pickpocketing or random violence).

If we could have a combination between that, the anonymous hotline, and the trained faculty and students with logos on their doors advertising safe spaces than I think we'd be set

[DoBesh]

Something anonymous should work indeed, or just an e-mailadres people can send messages to knowing it will be read by someone they can trust.