should i come out?

[a2p2l0]

so i am 16 years old so that makes me a junior in high school...
i have been wanting to come out at school (not to my family whom are old tradition, it is quite obvious that i could be gay but the old generation can't see that) because i am tired of people constantly looking at me, and wonder if i am gay or not. somewhere in me i don't want to come out and join the club called GSA (gay straight alliance) because my brother is a senior and i don't want him to find out... and i don't want a friend or someone to slip it out to my parents.

i feel my parents have enough burden to hold onto, because they have to take care of my oldest brother, my grandfather had passed away, and also my parents are christians. i don't want my brother to find out because i feel he might lower my confidence in myself if have anymore in myself because he is constantly commenting on how i look and act and how i am dumb and others...

i feel right now that i want to go kill myself for many reasons and one is that i am gay.
should i just stay in the closet forever from my family and most of the world?

[Sparticle]

Please don't kill yourself. Being gay is perfectly normal, and nothing to be ashamed of or stressed out about. But it sounds like you're more worried about how other people will react to you coming out than you are about being gay. I'm going to tell you, though, that there's nothing to worry about. If your friends really care about you, they won't care even if they have some negative preconceptions. As for your family, if they love you (and I'm sure they do), then they will put aside their religious biases because you're more important to them. If they don't, well, you only have to live with them for a couple more years anyway, then you can move out and go to college. Then you can tell them, "fuck you, if you can't accept me and love me for who I am then I don't need you anymore."
I guess it's ultimately up to you whether or not you want to come out right away, but you shouldn't be so apprehensive about it. Take your time if you want to, but you'll feel better afterward. ^_^

[ZanderZab]

do NOT kill yourself.
you are a beautiful person.
who gives a flying fuck if you are gay. if your family cannot except that then they will just have to deal with it. if your friends cant except it then they arent your friends.
nothing is worth killing yourself over.
please please please do not kill yourself.
Jesus says nothing about homosexuality.
i dont know you but i love you ok? like seriously dont do anything drastic like that.
there is an answer to every question. please just talk to someone about this.
you dont have to come out to anyone if you dont want to, right away. but sooner or later youll have to. and they will have to accept it. being gay should not matter.
just know that you are loved ok? please know that

[Zomm]

Sweetheart, do not kill yourself *knocks knife out of your hand*.

I think you could benefit from joining that GSA - especially if there are other little queers that go there. It would be helpful to get some of their input - and it possibly might be a comforting place considering you're not out to anyone.

If it spreads, it spreads - but I think you need to take baby steps.

[DoBesh]

Just tell some close friends, or at least be honest about it. When they ask you, admit it, don't pretend to be another person than you are. I don't know about the Gay alliances, because that's something I am not familiar with. You will probably feel better if you can be honest to your friends. Try that first.

I also don't think you should not hesitate telling it to your parents only because they already have so many problems. If you are sure your parents won't accept your sexuality it might be better to wait, but don't wait because you don't want to hurt their feelings. This is about you and not about your parents.

[a2p2l0]

well thnx guys.
i have cooled down a bit from yesterday night.
i guess all i needed was some cyber love
i will be taking it slow and figuring as to what i should do :]

[Tabula Rasa]

Like everyone else has stated, do not kill yourself. Surprisingly enough, this will not solve your problems. I'm going through almost exactly the same thing as you. I'm 16 years old, a junior in high school, and my family is very... Catholic. The only real difference in our situation is that i'm not gay, but bi. I'm not out at all yet, and probably won't be.

I can't offer you much advice, but i'll do my best.

- Consider the pros and cons of coming out versus the pros and cons of remaining in the closet. Make a list if you think it will help you (just be sure to hide it).

- I've never been in GSA or any group of club like that, but a lot of the guys on the site have recommended them to me in the past. I know you said that you didn't want to join, because you were worried that it may confirm some people's suspiscions of your homosexuality. It doesn't however. Plenty of staight people join these organizations.

- Read the Coming Out Stories thread. I've looked through them a bit in the past, and they're good, real sources of guys coming out. You can use the techniques that they did when they came out, as well as hear about how the decision to be open effected their lives.

Hope this helps, good luck.

[a2p2l0]

thnx covey :]