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Thread: Scared of giving my first blow job

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    Default Scared of giving my first blow job


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    So I'm in need of a little solace. I've been with my boyfriend for four months, maybe a week or two less. We've grown to love each other for a little under a year. We're best friends; we laugh together, we're silly together, we trust and respect each other.

    That being said, he never pressures me into doing anything. He'll do things for me even though he knows I'm apprehensive about giving it back to him. I'd gladly give him a hand job but it's blow jobs I'm afraid of. Honestly, I'd even have sex before giving him a blow job. I've mentioned how I'm afraid and he said he would wait until I was ready. That he found pleasure in pleasuring me. And he never brings it up, he never asks me for one. Still...I feel bad. And selfish. And I read these horror stories where boys dump their girlfriends for not giving them head or even when they say they don't care about not getting head, they're either lying or they're "settling". I don't want him to "settle". That sounds awful.

    But I'm so scared. I'm not familiar with the male reproductive organ. I'm a little bit immature about it. I feel like a kid. And I'm not grossed out by him. I love every part of him but I'm scared. I don't know. It's an unknown thing to me and we, as humans, are generally afraid of the unknown.

    I want to pleasure him, though. I want him to feel good. And I don't want him to settle. I'm really nervous that I'm not being a good girlfriend. I know he understands and that I mean more to him than sex, but I can't help but think he's "settling", like all the websites I've read have said.

    So...peace of mind, anyone?

    Also, he is my first boyfriend. And I am his first girlfriend. We're both sexually inexperienced. In other words, we're fledglings.


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  2. #2
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    It sounds like you should give it a try. You don't need to be perfect first time, but he will just love you all the more for being willing to learn. He sound's like a very caring guy, you're lucky, so he will understand if you try but want to stop because it doesn't feel right for you. There are many aspects to sex, we don't all have to do everything, but most guys will want to experience a bj and there is risk that if you can't satisfy his curiosity as to how it feels he may be tempted to play away.
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    tsoob is offline
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    What Nick said.
    You didn't say what are you afraid of - you've already been in touch with his penis.
    You said you give him HJs. I can't explain in details, but start from there and keep in mind BJ doesn't have to be like in porn (for start you don't even have to finish him in BJ, if you understand me, even one lick would be great for the first time - but now I can't say more).

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    Cutie95 is offline
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    I wouldn't worry about it, but the best thing that you can do is to get started is to swirl your tongue around the head while you give him a handjob. And no guy that actually cares about you would dump you over that. If he does, then he doesn't deserve you anyway.
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    The Right Honourable Member Jack's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    Seeing as it's his first time too, I doubt he'd notice if you are doing it wrong.
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    Thank you all for your advice! I haven't given him too many hand jobs...again I'm a scared little chicken. But I think I'm going to start with that and work my way up. I wish I was more sexually comfortable like he is.

    He's kind of...the first...male organ I've encountered? So I take things slow. I can get there, eventually, I hope. Right now I'm afraid of two things; actually doing it and losing him because I'm taking my sweet time in doing it.

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    tsoob is offline
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    Quote Originally Posted by atomickittykat View Post
    Right now I'm afraid of two things; actually doing it and losing him because I'm taking my sweet time in doing it.
    Don't be afraid of that.
    1. he should be happy with whatever you do for him (and I'm sure he is)
    2. if he dumps you because of your inexperience then you are better without him (but from what you said he really sounds like a nice guy who wont dump you because of something like that).

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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    Quote Originally Posted by tsoob View Post
    ...you don't even have to finish him in BJ, if you understand me...
    That's a really good point, not every one want's a guy to cum in their mouth and any guy should understand that. You can ask him to let you know when he's getting close if things get that far and just finish off by hand.
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    You will be fine and I agree with the others here. Just give it a try and if you can't you can't but easing into it may be just fine. Good luck.

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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    I totally agree with nick. I personally have never recived a bj but wonder...But I can gurantee you he will understand and there is no right way. It is differnet for everyone. So find what works for you.

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    scooter2005 is offline
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    Hey I would not worry about it we all had are first time and if he knows its your frist and he loves you all will be fine no one is the best when its there first time and if your not sure about the whole cum thing ask him to tell u so you know its comes and you can go online and find how to vid also I was scared the first time and now I love doing it its a blast
    allthetime and richiex like this.

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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    Yeah just relax and go with the flow. He'll appreciate it no matter what. Just ask him to warn you before he cums so that he doesn't shoot off in your mouth, unless you want that.

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    jessy is offline
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    he sounds like a really nice bf you're lucky and theres nothing to be afraid of once you start its really nice

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    RachaelR is offline
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    you cant be expected to be fantastic the 1st time with anything sexual. He sounds like a really nice guy, my opionin just realax and take it slow. nothing really to be afraid of once u get going.

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    chase5 is offline
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    Default Re: Scared of giving my first blow job

    He probably wouldn't notice cause it was the first time he ever felt it

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