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  1. #1
    disjetten is offline
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    Default Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?


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    Today, I totalled flipped out on my girlfriend because she constantly ignores me. Like it's not to the point where she doesn't kiss me, or say hi to me when i see her, but it's like whenever she is around her friends, she completely ignores me. Everytime I bring it up to her she gets mad at me and says "Well my friends are always going to be there." She told me she has commitment issues like getting attached to people because every guy who has been in her life has left her. Today I really wanted to say you know how you always tell me you have commitment issues, well guess what, if you keep ignoring me I'm going to be one of those guys, but I don't want to break up with her. I care for her so much, and it just hurts to be ignored by someone you care for so much.

    Everytime we fight, we never fight about me, becuase I treat her like gold. Its always over how she ignores me and shit, and she doesnt want to realize that if she keeps it up i'm not going to be here for long. I can only put up with so much shit, and what really annoys me is how she acts like nothing is wrong when we talk about it. Then we finally talk about it and she changes for like a day then goes back to her old habbits. I dont think talking will do too much in this case, but i'm open to what people have to say
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  2. #2
    Ghoti is offline
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    Default Re: Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?

    don't make threats about how if she doesn't change you'll dump her. just explain to her exactly how you feel, about her and the situation. if she still doesn't respect or understand your feelings then it's probably not worth it.
    "Humility is no substitute for a good personality."
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  3. #3
    disjetten is offline
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    Default Re: Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?

    Well, it happens constantly, i never said that i was going to dump her but if she keeps it up she better realize that i'm not going to put up with it.
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  4. #4
    Martial is offline
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    Default Re: Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?

    Don't put up with that crap. If she can look you in the eyes and tell you that her friends are more important than you because they're always going to be there, and you're not, then she's not worth it. No wonder all her boyfriends have left her!
    House of The Rising Sun
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    "I leave Sisyphus at the foot of the mountain! One always finds one's burden again. But Sisyphus teaches the higher fidelity that negates the gods and raises rocks. He too concludes that all is well. This universe henceforth without a master seems to him neither sterile nor futile. Each atom of that stone, each mineral flake of that night filled mountain, in itself forms a world. The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy."
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  5. #5
    Utopian is offline
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    Default Re: Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?

    I know the feelings of talking about an issue to death and not seeing any changes, I've gone through it with my boyfriend enough times. My situation was a little different, in that the problem was him breaking little promises, but the same in that everytime I'd bring it up he'd change for a day or a week or a month, and then just do it again.

    Unfortunately, the only solution was to talk, and we did - over and over again. Finally, it came to a head one night when I broke down in tears, and we sat together on my bed with me blubbering through all of my thoughts and him watching how much it hurt me. I wish he could've seen it sooner, but in the times we'd talked about it previously he hadn't realized how much it actually hurt me, only that it annoyed me.

    So, my suggestion would be to talk about it, as usual. But don't do it in a way that shows your anger and your frustration. Don't act like you're mad at her for her behaviour, because that really isn't the issue here. Instead, take the issue on an emotional level. Explain to her how it makes you feel when she does this, how it hurts you, etc. Be detailed, let her see how much its actually affecting you above and beyond not being happy about it.
    "He lay on his bed at night listening to the silver light of stars crashing against the window screen" -- Anne Carson

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  6. #6
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    Default Re: Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?

    ^^ thats all you need to know
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  7. #7
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    Default Re: Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?

    Don't beat around the bush... Either be with her or really maybe by ignoring you she's sorta trying to tell you to beat it... I'd say give up on her and move on... Maybe if you leave her she'll realize what she had and how amazing you are and learn to treat you better or even other's better... This girl sounds very insecure and Immature... I know that you are told never to completely ditch your friends for your guy, but you are supposed to divide your time and make the time you spend with your significant other special... To me spending time with my b/f is soo fun and its important, I really enjoy being around him, he makes me feel good about myself... Maybe if you are okay with talking to her friends see if you can ask her friends whats up w/ her... Girls do talk... I bet if there is something bothering her about you, her friends will know about it...
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  8. #8
    kt8
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    Default Re: Girlfriend ignoring me, waht should I do?

    As far as I can see, she is insecure. She has been dumped on by every single one of her boyfriends and feels that you will do the same. Its only natural. She is putting up her defenses so as not to get hurt. She thinks her friends are more important because she has never been hurt by them. They are girls, you are a boy, and unfortunately, due to her past history, all guys are the same.

    The best thing to do is to calm yourself down, apologise for flipping out, and tell her you only did it as she is hurting you. Its gone full circle. She is blaming you and hurting you for all the pain she has suffered in the past. That isn't fair, and you need to explain that to her as gently as possible. She just needs reassurance that you'll never hurt her, and that you're not like all these other guys.Don't let her walk all over you, but tell her it can't ever be good if she doesn't change.
    ''I dropped a tear into the ocean. The day I find it I will stop loving you''





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