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  1. #1
    brian90 is offline
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    Cry Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies


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    What can I say?

    When you tell lies about something, eventually those lies come back to haunt you. And there are some lies that are unforgiveable, even between people who call each other true and close friends.

    I'm currently learning this lesson the hard way, and believe me, it hurts like all hell.

    Through my own stupidity and complete disregard for any moral or ethical sense of being, I've managed to cause other people all kinds of pain and suffering. I've apologised, but I don't expect the apologies to be accepted or for any kind of forgiveness, because if there's one cardinal rule is that you don't hide stuff from your mates by lying about it. Then lying about the lies, and so on.

    Please, don't anyone make the same mistakes that I have. It *destroys* friendships in an instant.

    I fear there is no salvaging of any previous friendship from this, and should the people I have hurt ever come across this message, I am more sorry than mere words can ever express, that I've caused you so much grief and pain. I don't ever expect there'll be forgiveness, nor understanding, and you have every reason to dismiss this post as yet more lies and deceit. And there's no way you can ever know for sure that any words from me are the truth. But these are, whether you know it or not.

    Should there ever be any hope of reconciliation, then you know where to find me. But if you never want to see me, hear from me, or even have my name mentioned in your presence again, then I understand and accept full responsibility for everything that has led to this point.

    To people reading this and not understanding what it's all about, let me summarise. Good and true friends are the most important thing you can have in the world. Never, EVER, do anything to break up those kinds of friendships. Nothing on this earth is worth this kind of pain, not for yourself and especially not for the pain you end up causing those people who mean so much to you.




    So long, and thanks for all the fish.


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  2. #2
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    Being in the wrong is never easy, and I can totally appreciate your situation. Sometimes folks lie thinking that by shielding their friends and loved ones from the truth actually creates a good situation when in reality it only delays the day of reckoning. Perhaps you thought what your friends did not know would not hurt them.

    It is really none of our business what had happened to prompt you to make this post, but one thing that is for certain is that time heals most wounds or lessens the pain of even the most traumatic experience. I sincerely hope that you will eventually find peace of mind and will eventually be reconciled or at least be on civil terms with those you hurt.

    When those whom we love hurt us we may have the knee-jerk reaction of disowning such a person and sharing some very choice words. The fact remains that all of us make mistakes in life covering a very wide spectrum. While enormous mistakes may carry very terrible ramifications, in the end of the day amends can be made for even the most horrendous of errors. The most important thing is that you realized that you did something wrong and feel genuine remorse showing that you are a decent person who honestly cares about others and the impacts of your actions. Gaining trust is a very hard, long process, but loosing trust is a very easy thing. It feels terrible to suddenly be on the outs with your loved ones, but love overcomes everything as long as you do your part to slowly repair the damage of whatever happened. It is going to be hard for a while, but things will work out slowly but surely.

    My regrets for being so nebulous on this post. You seem like a genuinely nice person, and at least you now have the burden of lies removed from you thus enabling you to be free.

    I hope your farewell message is not geared to GovTeen. As many of the others have mentioned you are a very valuable member of this community who has done so much to help through your very thoughtful and insightful posts. It is folks like you that makes GovTeen a good resource and haven for those who have doubts and need answers. I sincerely hope that you are not departing this community as that would be terrible for all of us. Whatever you have done must have been an error in judgment, and I highly doubt you would have done anything malicious to anyone especially on this forum. Your presence is very much needed around here, and I really hope that you will not disappear.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    Quote Originally Posted by brian90 View Post
    What can I say?

    When you tell lies about something, eventually those lies come back to haunt you. And there are some lies that are unforgiveable, even between people who call each other true and close friends.

    I'm currently learning this lesson the hard way, and believe me, it hurts like all hell.

    Through my own stupidity and complete disregard for any moral or ethical sense of being, I've managed to cause other people all kinds of pain and suffering. I've apologised, but I don't expect the apologies to be accepted or for any kind of forgiveness, because if there's one cardinal rule is that you don't hide stuff from your mates by lying about it. Then lying about the lies, and so on.

    Please, don't anyone make the same mistakes that I have. It *destroys* friendships in an instant.

    I fear there is no salvaging of any previous friendship from this, and should the people I have hurt ever come across this message, I am more sorry than mere words can ever express, that I've caused you so much grief and pain. I don't ever expect there'll be forgiveness, nor understanding, and you have every reason to dismiss this post as yet more lies and deceit. And there's no way you can ever know for sure that any words from me are the truth. But these are, whether you know it or not.

    Should there ever be any hope of reconciliation, then you know where to find me. But if you never want to see me, hear from me, or even have my name mentioned in your presence again, then I understand and accept full responsibility for everything that has led to this point.

    To people reading this and not understanding what it's all about, let me summarise. Good and true friends are the most important thing you can have in the world. Never, EVER, do anything to break up those kinds of friendships. Nothing on this earth is worth this kind of pain, not for yourself and especially not for the pain you end up causing those people who mean so much to you.




    So long, and thanks for all the fish.
    You are a good person who made a bad choice. You've helped so many people with so many problems. You've been a wonderful moderator here, you've upheld so many rules (save the one you're referencing ), you've done so much good for this place, and you've done no harm save for the pain of the truth after such a lie.

    You're a good man. Just don't be stupid.

    Stay in touch, dammit.

    P.S. - Listen to your own advice.

  4. #4
    Natatha is offline
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    Quote Originally Posted by XxAnubisxX View Post
    You are a good person who made a bad choice. You've helped so many people with so many problems. You've been a wonderful moderator here, you've upheld so many rules (save the one you're referencing ), you've done so much good for this place, and you've done no harm save for the pain of the truth after such a lie.

    You're a good man. Just don't be stupid.

    Stay in touch, dammit.

    P.S. - Listen to your own advice.
    x2

    You need to realize, most of the people who got to know you love you. I'm not worried about it, I'm still having a tad hard time, but I'll figure it out sooner or later

    Don't worry about it, I understand. and, as Kerrick said..

    STAY IN TOUCH, Damn Aussie...
    Quote Originally Posted by Mavrick View Post
    I don't need all of Govteen knowing I like cock up my ass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kerrick
    I want to fuck a dog in the ass, but only if it has hives.
    Quote Originally Posted by Hawkeye
    My father's people say that at the birth of the sun and of his brother the moon, their mother died. So the sun gave to the earth her body, from which was to spring all life. And he drew forth from her breast the stars, and the stars he threw into the night sky to remind him of her soul.
    *PLEASE NOTE: I am not responsible for you taking any medical-type advice I give. If you have any serious concerns, see your doctor. Caduceus in my avatar, does not make me a doctor, nor a certified medical personnel. I am currently undergoing training to get my certification, but have not completed it yet.

  5. #5
    FourOhSeven! is offline
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    Brian, I don't know what happened, but I do know you don't deserve to be sad, or depressed. My time here has been made so much easier because of people like you. Nice people, good people, smart people. Nice, good, cool and smart is all you. But I'm going to say this, I have no idea what's caused you this pain, but I do hope it ends soon, and you feel happy again, because you deserve happiness.
    DJ, easy my fucking mind.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    Yes, Brian, I back what everyone else is saying. People make bad decisions. It happens. I've done it a lot. I'm pretty sure I know what you're getting at, and let me say, that although lying was a bad choice, I have no problem forgiving it. You've been great. You were there the other day talk to me and help me out in a time of need, and I really want to thank you for that. I don't think any less of you. It was just a bad decision.

    Also, you've helped a lot of people with things you've done. All of that certainly overshadows what you've lied about, I'm sure.

    I'm not leaving. I want to stay in touch.

  7. #7
    Green Member Zelda's Avatar
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    I too am aware of what has happened, and can say that you have been a wonderful member of the site and certainly contributed in a major way. Unfortunately this cannot help the betrayal many people will feel, and you cannot really change that. Such misrepresentation breeds mistrust and wariness.

    Former Health and Development/Help and Advice Moderator
    Retired G-Mod


  8. #8
    pulses is offline
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    I'm a bit lost, this is the first time i've logged into gov in some time really.

    Like a stab to my heart Brian, a stab to my heart! I joke, i don't know enough about the situation, You're still a nice person in my mind, and the fact you came out with it is meritable.


    Wish you the best Brian.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Friendships ... destroyed by own stupidity and lies

    I believe the following announcement thread from GovHeadquarters can shed some light on this situation: Brian90 Unregistration

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